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Everyone else does! The subject matter of bar girls has been discussed into oblivion on hundreds of other websites. I don't enjoy degrading people either. I don't enjoy talking about women as if they are inhuman, as if they are objects to be sexually exploited. I have a daughter and a mother.

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Go figure. Don't get me wrong: I have no problem with casual sex. I am not a prude. What consenting adults do together is up to them. So, the point of this article about bar girls is to go thai bar women the heavy make-up and high heels and look at the industry from the ground up.

To strip naked no pun intended the circumstances that have resulted in so many women entering the industry and ultimately being de-humanised by punters and society at large. Married young in a rural thai bar women — usually in the North or North East somewhere — and partnered by her family with an ill-suited young man, one who quickly becomes restless and ends up boozing and womanising like his father did, and his father before that.

Boy leaves girl with one or two. Girl receives no social security money from the state, and no child maintenance from the father of her children.

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So, the pressure falls on the girl to find work to support the children and her aging parents, who, by the way, she has already disappointed by having a failed marriage, and further upset by now being a single mother and scarring the face of family pride. Girl then becomes determined to provide her children with a better life, and to elevate the face of her family in the village. So even if the girl wants to leave after arrival, she will have to work off that debt first.

This is a devious way to keep the recruitment s high and the deserters low. Once you've crossed the line, you might as well try and thai bar women it work, right?

Cultural & social obligations

What I see in the bar thai bar women not a piece of meat to be exploited, but a girl that grew up believing that thai bar women day, when she finishes school, she will find a respectable job and be able to make her parents proud. I see a girl who naively bought into the idea that her teenage husband would stay faithful and do his best to always support her and their kids, and invested in the antiquated cultural requirement that a girl must marry the first seemingly decent boy she is caught flirting with.

I see a girl who felt that she had to sell her soul for the bigger picture, to go against the morals she was brought up in an attempt to better the future of her family. I see a girl who has sacrificed her own happiness, and potentially her mental stability, for the benefit of her family. No one should ever have to do that.

2 thai bar girl stock photos, vectors, and illustrations are available royalty-free.

And then I see a plethora or foreign men coming to exploit, not help, as they may proclaim, the unfortunate situation of a woman failed by a society that does not provide social welfare or adult education programs for single mothers, and does not hold men in the slightest bit able for their thai bar women. But as I have covered, the cultural pressures and limited choice of economic progression force the hand into the fire.

I very much doubt it. Of course, there will always be a handful of women in Thailand who left a decent career to make more money in the sex industry; every one seems to have an anecdotal story on this.

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But we know this isn't the norm; it's not common. My eyes danced when I first saw the bright lights, high heels, elegance and youthful beauty of the girls in the go-go bars. I couldn't see any hollow-eyed druggies with greasy thai bar women, no bad attitudes looking for the quickest transaction possible.

However, the more I learnt about the industry behind the scenes — the social-economic structure of the country, the systematic oppression of the lower classes and regional prejudice — the easier it became to see the emptiness behind the smiles and gracious gestures. These are low-income earning men that will generally resemble similar characteristics to the inadequate man they were once married to. As we know, gambling, alcoholism and domestic abuse thai bar women rife in such economic settings.

Moreover, once a Thai girl has been in the bar, she will struggle to get a Thai boyfriend at all. If you know an iota about Thai culture, you'll know that a girl who works or has worked in a farang-style beer bar will struggle to earn the respect of other Thais going forward.

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Of course, few will refer to her as a prostitute. In fact, the word prostitute is frowned upon so severely that Thais seldom label a girl they thai bar women to be a prostitute as a prostitute. A girl who has worked in the bar, regardless of whether she bags a rich farang or not, will suffer a lifetime of gossip and stares from the village thai bar women, not to mention the standard whispers and looks most Thai women endure when they have a foreign boyfriend.

What's strange is that Thailand has an abundance of what one might refer to as average, middle-class single women — university educated and hardworking — yet many foreign men choose to hang around in the bar scene paying for sex while looking for a partner. They then wonder why it all goes belly up. Not so long ago a friend of mine was in town and he wanted to walk down the infamous bar-laden Soi Nana in Bangkok.

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We paced the cesspit of hawkers, child and amputee beggars, ladyboy and female street hookers and plethora of unkempt men. Honestly, it made me never want to walk on that street again. I think Bob Dylan put it best when he sung:. Imagining that one of those girls could be your own daughter or sister brings the conscience into play.

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It makes guys realize that these girls have feelings and emotions beyond the fantasy of the delirious male ego that believes these girls are more than happy to be exploited for sex in exchange for money. Becoming a full-time bargirl takes conditioning.

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Just look at the face of a new addition to a bar, and then return two months later to see her stripped of all that might have been sacred. I have seen it with my own eyes…. I will never forget one very timid girl who looked like a rabbit in headlights on arriving at her new place of work. Three months later my travels took me away from thai bar women island, and as my taxi passed the bar on the way to Samui airport, she was swinging on the dance pole, hair extensions, knee high boots and calling out to men walking by.

The way men generally discuss these girls is as if they were born to do it. Again, this is a self-preserving attempt to separate their actions from the cause. Perhaps some do take to it like a duck to water, but the majority have to be broken in and are conditioned by the Mama Sang and other working girls. So he chooses to pay, which may be the only avenue he has to getting close to what thai bar women really wants from a woman. There's nothing wrong with that, if the transaction is consensual, right?

Yet all too often in this transactional realm, the man falls foul to the strategic lies of a seasoned player. He gets too involved. The lines get thai bar women. He forgets it is a finanical agreement not a real romance and ends up losing not just his integrity but a considerable financial investment. Of course it's possible, and I am sure there are many happy relationships that have lasted the distance between bar girls and westerners.

The amount of foreigners maintaining contact with bargirls and sending money to them once they return home is testament to the fact that in many cases the needy find the needy on common ground.

The success rate, however, comes into question when reading all the negative stories foreigners post online. And no doubt thai bar women some cases there is physiological damage similar to that experienced by victims of sexual abuse, albeit the bargirl act is consensual and transactional. The reality is that most struggle to ever have a normal, loving relationship post the bar.

The lucky few are able to settle for a retired expat, who is prepared to pay the bills in return for regular thrills. But then what is true love, anyway? When you hit the bars on a Saturday night, I wouldn't blame you for thinking the last paragraph regarding drug and alcohol abuse and refuges is a little far fetched. I would have thought so many years ago. I met well over 50 women there who were victims of bars.

Life before the bar

Admittedly this is getting rarer, but it still happens in the very poorest of rural areas. For these girls, the fewer customers you go with the more your rent accumulates on top of the money that was paid for you to secure the job in the first place. Of course, not every case fits this template, and there are many variations in circumstance, but the point is that the majority of bar migrations aren't fully transparent, and the majority of girls, however they may seem now, would have been largely ignorant to the life that would become them.

Three thousand words in and I hope you may now understand why I do not glamourize the bar scene on my blog. Thai bar women key difference between the dearly loved women in your life and a bar girl is an education and a level playing field of opportunity, which amounts to nothing more than the lottery that is birth.

I want to end by thai bar women you Mae Sai by the group Carabou. The song is about a girl from the North who goes away to become a prostitute to make money for her parents. She gets hooked on drugs and by the time she returns her mother is dead. The video has English subs, so don't worry if you don't speak Thai.

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May 16, at am. Dec 15, at am. Apr 05, at pm.